Thursday, March 25, 2010

Isn’t it amazing that nine months ago, it was a Thursday the 25th?

June 25th to be exact.

The number 9 can sometimes symbolize eternity. It is also technically the amount of time it takes for a human to go from conception to birth.

Nine months ago is also when we lost our beloved Michael.

Isn’t it amazing that the fans are still grieving? We still carry broken hearts. We are still confused about his death.

We weren’t ready to give him up, but we had to.

So how do we repair this hole in our hearts? There has been an unrepairable rip in the fabric of time. The wound of him leaving us is a deep scratch in our Michael Jackson vinyl. The virtual record needle is stuck and the sweet echo of his voice, whether it be the sparkling sound of Smooth Criminal or the gritty lyrics of They Don’t Really Care About Us, is playing continuously in our minds, in our vehicles or on our computers.

It is still hard to comprehend that he is now dancing among the stars, performing for the heavenly hosts and singing with the angels.

But… even with heavy hearts, we can still look toward the heavens and smile… being an angel becomes you, Michael. It becomes YOU.

You were our angel for many years

And we thank God for lending you to us for this short memorable time.

Sunday, March 21, 2010

Michael loved trees. I just hate that he had to leave his Giving Tree when he abandoned Neverland. I envision him before he moved on, visiting Neverland again, climbing his favorite tree and even sitting for a spell underneath it.

The Giving Tree is also a book by Shel Silverstein, one of my favorites. I never read this anywhere, but I bet Michael loved the book as well. Here is a little bit of a synopsis of the book copied from Wiki:

The Giving Tree is a tale about a relationship between a young boy and a tree in a forest. The tree always provides the boy with what he wants: branches on which to swing, shade in which to sit, apples to eat, branches with which to build a home. As the boy grows older he requires more and more of the tree. The tree loves the boy very much and gives him anything he asks for. In the ultimate act of self-sacrifice, the tree lets the boy cut her down so the boy can build a boat in which he can sail. The boy leaves the tree, now a stump. Many years later, the boy, now an old man, returns and the tree says, "I have nothing left to give you." The boy replies, " I do not need much now, just a quiet place to sit and rest." The tree then says, "Good! A tree stump is a great place to do just that! Come boy, sit down and be happy." The boy obliged and the tree was happy.

Isn't that beautiful? So picture this: Michael's spirit came back to Neverland to visit his favorite tree and the tree said, "Come Michael, sit down and be happy." Michael's tree didn't give him apples to eat, but it gave him words. And with the words he made great songs.

Tuesday, March 16, 2010

Here is the transcript of a speech I gave last night:


Dancing Machine

Isn’t it amazing how music can evoke a feeling or makes you remember an event that you may have forgotten--- something that may have happened to you years ago? Well that is a litle of what my speech is about tonight.

My mother and I moved from New York to Oklahoma when I was a child. Now I don’t particularly think it was a great move. But since I didn’t have anything to do with it, we moved to this little town in Oklahoma. I’m going to tell you right now, sometimes it was boring. The difference in New York and Oklahoma is indescribable. I was always planning and plotting about where I was going to go after I graduated from high school and left that little town. But the truth is, living there gave me a lot of interesting memories that I can talk about. There weren’t a lot of things to do in this little town, especially on Saturdays. On that day, you would mainly hang out with your friends, go downtown window shopping or stay home watching TV. One thing that I looked forward to every Saturday was looking at Soul Train on TV. Soul Train was black America’s American Bandstand. It was dubbed the hippest trip in America by the host Don Cornelius. My friends and I looked at Soul Train to get the latest fashions even though we couldn’t afford them, to look at the latest dance steps even though we couldn’t do them, and to see who was going to be the musical guest. Then we’d talk about when we got to school Monday.

One Saturday while watching Soul Train, Don Cornelius announced that next week’s musical guest would be the Jackson 5. Oh my God! The Jackson 5? Did he say the Jackson5? Are you serious? Who didn’t like the Jackson 5 back then? Nobody! What was it about the Jackson 5 that I liked? They were just so cute with their little afros and their perfectly coordinated clothes. They were magic! I loved when they performed. They could dance, they could sing --- they were like little Temptations with a base and a guitar, but only better. My friends and I were always choosing which one we were going to marry. Forget about getting Michael when we were dividing up the Jackson Brothers though, he was always taken first. Michael was about 15 at the time, his voice had started to mature and it was just something about him that I always liked. So that whole week in elementary school was bearable because I knew on Saturday I would be watching the Jackson 5 on TV. Saturday rolls around and Soul Train comes on. I was never still when I watched Soul Train as a kid, I would be up dancing along with the dancers. In my mind I was a Soul Train dancer. Then Don Cornelius announces here are the Jackson 5 singing their new hit, Dancing Machine. Oh boy! There they were! I was glued to the set. I was mesmerized. This was probably the only time I was quiet and sitting on the couch. The song was amazing. Then during the bridge or the break portion of the song, Michael Jackson steps forward between the microphone stands and the edge of the stage and does this incredible dance that I had never seen before in my life. This was way before the moonwalk. He glided forward across the stage moving his head from side to side with these stiff jerking movements. I jumped up and moved closer to the tv. I couldn’t get close enough. It was incredible. I was in love with Michael Jackson from that day on. When they were through performing and Don Cornelius had finished interviewing them. I ran into my mother’s room and yelled, “Mama, we have GOT to go to the record store NOW! You have got to buy the Jackson 5 song they just sang on Soul Train!” My mother looked at me like, ‘what?’ And then she said something that momentarily broke my heart, “I’m not going down to no record store right now.” But she did add, “But next time when we’re downtown, we can go there and you get your little record,” I sadly walked out the room. That wasn’t good enough. I was so disappointed but I guess it would have to do… for now. I think I even cried. Eventually, I did get to the record store and bought the 45 record of Dancing Machine and one of the little yellow record spacers that you put in the middle of 45s so you could play them on your record player. Wow, my first Jackson 5 record. I loved that song so much. I’d put it on and dance and dance and dance. I even brought it to school. We use to have record day in music class at school on some Fridays. We couldn’t get up and move around; we had to sit in our little wooden chairs while the teacher played our records we brought from home. You know I could hardly sit still when she played my record.

But on June 25th of last year, my Dancing Machine died. It was like my childhood record player died. It’s hard to describe how sadden I was when Michael died. Hearing the news felt was like a member of my family died, a long distant cousin that I hadn’t seen in a while or an old boyfriend that I hadn’t talked to in years but I’d heard about from time to time. I suddenly found myself trying to gather up all the memorabilia I had on Michael Jackson and buying things that I always wanted and I didn’t have. I bought his one and only autobiography Moon Walk and started to read it. As I’m reading I come to Chapter 3 which is entitled Dancing Machine. Within that chapter, he talks about how he loved the groove and the feel of the song, Dancing Machine. He worked hard to find a dance move that would make the song more exciting when he and his brothers performed it. Michael turned to a street dance called the Robot. He was amazed that when he did the Robot that first time on Soul Train, Dancing Machine became an overnight hit (no thanks to my mother). As I read that passage, I began to remember that very moment and felt that same wonderful excitement I felt back when I was a little kid. It was satisfying to know that a song that I loved and that was special to me was also special to him as well.

Thursday, February 25, 2010

A Song In My Heart!

Today has been a great day so far. I finally wrote down some notes of this movie that's been going on in my head for the past couple of days. I'm going to see if I can work it into something else I am writing. I was excited because in the midst of writing, a song pushed it's way to the forefront of my mind. I just went to a new page and started writing down the words. I love when that happens! damn I wish I knew how to write down the melody in my head. Here's a couple of the verses of the song I entitled Some How :

When I believe it
I can receive it
And I take my eyes toward the sky
No one can stop me
Your love won’t drop me
And in my heart I know the reason why

You are the one that sets my life on fire
You are the one that gives me that intense desire
You are the one I’ve always dreamed of
You are the perfect fit, a hand to glove.

whatcha think? more to come...

Wednesday, February 24, 2010

Michael Jackson - Michael Jackson Death Tape Revealed

http://www.contactmusic.com/news.nsf/story/michael-jackson-death-tape-revealed_1133255

This part in the article made me so so sad:

The voice is heard saying: "Patient is Michael Jackson, the pop star singer. No pulse, no breathing. Unresponsive. Tried to resuscitate him. Unsuccessful. We've done everything we can. We should be there in five minutes. It doesn't look good. It doesn't look good."

This only confirms that Murray knew MJ was dead.

Sunday, February 21, 2010

He’s Tiger Woods, but he’s also Michael Jackson

http://www.kansascity.com/sports/story/1762719.html

When I first read the above article by Jason Whitlock this morning it pissed me off! I thought, "What? Is this dude just trying to start a fight?" This is a SPORTS article written by a sports writer. Why is Michael Jackson even mentioned in it? He couldn't find a tragic sports figure that has fallen from grace? It's fashionable to put down Michael Jackson right now to enhance your article it seemes. Maybe I'm wrong but isn't it a long stretch to compare Tiger Woods to Michael? On top of that, it's a downright insult! The article is well written and I can see how he probably made a little chart and wrote out his similarities but come on! It reminds me of a stupid high school paper where you have to write a comparison paper and pick two different subjects and show how they are similar. I can write a paper on brocolli and asparagus but they are not the same vegetable. Michael was accused of a crime that he didn't commit. The LA DA hounded him for over 10 years and tried to send him to jail on bogus charges. Tiger Woods, on the other hand, commited a moral and personal crime against his wife, family and his precious repetition. There is no jail time required for what Tiger did. But as I thought about this article, I started thinking. Maybe there are some similarities. They are trying to crucify Tiger Woods in the media similarly to how they crucified Michael. The problem with Mr. Whitlock's article is that if u think about something long enough, you can come up with something any two things have in common. If you think about brocolli and asparagus, you can come up with the fact that they are both green and vegetables. We know for sure that Michael experienced much much more hate from the media and for a longer period of time than Tiger will ever experience. Tiger's problem with the media just started, i.e., it's an unfair comparison. Tiger has got to live a long time to get to the level of hate that was given to Michael.

Monday, January 02, 2006

OKLAHOMA BURNING

I just looked on CNN and saw my former home state suffering from wild fires because of draught conditions. I remember several times driving on a highway with grass fires on each side. Somewhat scary. Such a contrast that they are dry and having fires, while here we are experiencing rain and a forecast of snow and sleet.

Hope all had a wonderful Christmas. Have you looked at the mall parking lots? Someone needs to tell those people that Christmas is over, STOP SHOPPING! How many packages of bows and Christmas wrapping paper do you need for next Christmas?

Oh Happy New Year, btw. Here's a little ditty I jotted down recently:

HAPPY NEW YEAR
I'll exclaim
Wishing all love fortune and fame
for me, I'm staying away
from resolutions
Maybe I should work on some solutions
to a few questions I have...

Why do I procrastinate?
why come I am always late?
Why do I turn left, not right?
will I be able to sell anything I write?
Why do I always stay too long?
will I ever find a place to belong?


Take time to reflect, don't forget to care
Pray for peace, people, everywhere

Wednesday, November 16, 2005

So this blog seems to be dying for lack of attendance... by me no less!

I just read a blog that said he was blogging for Jesus which made me laugh. Blogging for Jesus - that is since Jesus can't blog himself - he must have a stand-in blogger. (hmm a thought just entered my mind. Was that what the Bible is, especially the New Testament?? weren't they blogging for Jesus?) OK OK enough of that. Two things you should never discuss - religion and other ppls religion.

It's the 2nd week that I am finally out of the hell hole job I was in. Well the company wasn't a hell hole, but working with this one old bitch (it was only a two person office) was pure hell. I'm sure the bitch thought she was hurting me by getting rid of me. Instead it was an answered prayer - and I wasn't even praying for that. I'm very disillusioned at working a temp job for a while now. Damn the temp job industry. It is so easy to get a temp/consulting job in my field than get a permanent job. But that was the worst bitch I have ever worked with in my life. I wrote a poem in her honor on the website. Death to the bitch. haha!

Monday, August 08, 2005

A smoker, I'm not
So sad to hear
We lost Peter Jennings today
He's been on the news
as long as I can remember
Out of the three nightly newscasters
he was the most distinguished
such a gentleman
we lost

Saturday, July 16, 2005

I am back after a long absence.
I hope I have not lost my essence.

More fruitless words later
Hopefully they will cater

to a more friendlier atmosphere

Monday, October 13, 2003

Columbus Day RELIVED!


I have enjoyed the day off but I have so much to do! #2 daughter has a dentist appt in 10 minutes and I'm writing on this thing. Tomorrow is the the old asshole's birthday, so I'm taking the kids to the mall to pick him out something.

Thursday, October 02, 2003

Welcome to my world!

This is my first post. So forgive the shortness and the unorganized thoughts. More later from the girl...